Time to breathe...

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Over the past two weeks, I have had a chance to step away from the computer, in fact step away from all 'tech' and take some time to 'be', as the modern term is. A week away in the Devon countryside with no WiFi and limited phone signal was the perfect retreat from the world and a time to let my brain rest!

I admit, I didn't do so well with the "no screens after 9pm" rule that I wrote about previously - there is always something to look up or google, or someone messages you and you see who it is out of the corner of your eye and...

So, this trip was the well-needed excuse to do just that. I can tell you, my husband found it harder than me the first night, before he discovered a book to get stuck into. I was a little bit like that after my book was read so quickly! It was what we needed - what we all need, now and again.

It bought me back to a couple of years ago, when I discovered mindfulness. I learnt it from a book and CD by Mark Williams and Danny Penman (Mindfulness: A practical guide...) and followed their 8 week programme religiously. I thought I would keep it up, but alas that was not the case - I really am difficult to motivate for long, I realise as I am writing this blog. No sticking power! I get enthusiastic and then after I've learnt it, it goes. Oh dear...

Anyway, mindfulness was good for me at the time in question and made me realise that a lot of the parts of mindfulness, I do anyway - sitting and being whilst listening to the world around me; being able to stop and breathe and ground myself in a quick couple of minutes; closing the door on the world to take a moment to concentrate on my breath. All of these things I do and I did before learning about mindfulness.

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What I did learn was how to meditate. How to take the time to focus on your body and be aware of every part of it. Some sessions took 5 mins, some 30, but all had a focus and the longer ones were guided - I find it easier when I am being talked through the process! It took ages to learn and I found it difficult all the way through. To keep your mind so focused for a length of time can be near impossible when you are stressed, and sometimes even when you aren't, but have so much on your mind.

I'm looking back through the log I kept now, and it shows my progress, although at the time it didn't feel like that. It felt like a hard slog... However, it got me through a difficult period of my life. My last entry says "now that I am not in such a stressful environment, I wonder how much I will have to rely on meditation to give my mind peace". I had made the bold move to resign my job and save my health. Sadly, it was only to be repeated further down the line, but interestingly I didn't reach for the CD this time. Apart from the fact I had loaned it to my mum by then, it was friends and family that helped me through - I guess time spent with them frees your mind and stops the damaging thoughts in the same way.

As well as ensuring time spent with people you love, I would definitely recommend trying mindfulness as a tool for stress and relieving the pressures of the everyday. The above book is a great starting point, but there is an explosion of others out there now. Courses, workshops, individual tuition... it goes on. I strongly believe that we need an outlet, and being 50 or older, doesn't mean we have our lives sorted! Time to breathe is a necessity - whatever age!

I visited Chartwell recently, home of the Churchills, and was fascinated by the current exhibition about Clementine Churchill. She was such a huge ambassador for the women's movement, but you can see that throughout her life and despite the heavy workload, she always made time for herself - the original 'me time'. What a great example to us all!

https://www.nationaltrust.org.uk/chartwell/features/chartwell-winter-exhibition-clementine-churchill---speaking-for-herself

Have you tried mindfulness? Let me know how you felt about it or what worked for you. Or, if you have tried anything else that helps with the clutter in our minds, please join the conversation! It would be great to share our experiences so that everyone can benefit from the ideas :)

“Tension is who you think you should be, relaxation is who you are.” 

Ancient Chinese Proverb.

True Silence?

Silence only reigns when we force it on ourselves,
Closed away from the world.
Outside in the most peaceful of spots
The world is awake.
A cacophony of voices beautiful
Repeating over and over their calls
For longevity of their line.
Some sing ballads to their loves
Keeping in touch, never losing.

But we lose
by always longing for silence.

D Swann, April 2018.